Ecclesiates 3:2

a time to be born and a time to die....

and Dad's time has come
this evening he slowly stopped breathing
and left us

without him

and now it is time for us to weep
to hold each other and share our loss

Update on Dad

Dad is less responsive to everyone and everything. He is still aware of when they turn in bed, but not much more. He doesn't ask for Mom as he did. The last few times he called her Mommy, and when he held her hand he almost hurt her holding on so tight.

In the last 24 hours they have had 18" of snow, with 7" more due tomorrow. Mom spent last night with Dad and went home for awhile today, after the roads were safe. My brother Wayne cleaned out part of her drive for her. My brother David has been in Wisconsin working and has been driving home with the newest snowstorm stuck to his bumper. Both my sisters are there everyday, and some of the grandchildren that live near drop in often, so Dad isn't alone.

That's all I have for now.

No Tube

Mom struggled with the decision of a feeding tube for Dad. He is totally unable to swallow. Mom didn't want him to suffer from hunger pains. The nurses gave her and my sisters info pro and con, and Mom talked with the Doctor and my brothers. The Dr said patients like my Dad feel no pain from hunger and we have no guarantee that he will live even one day longer with a feeding tube; especially with the kidneys shutting down. And Dad doesn't like things stuck in him and pulls them out.

When Mom went home last night she spent a long time in prayer about it and asked for a sign. This morning, Dad was able to carry on a understandable discussion. At one point he told my sister, Becky, to look in the corner and asked if she saw them. Who? There was no one visible. Dad, said, again, look, there is my Mother and Sister.

The hospital staff are doing all they can to keep comfortable. It just a matter of time.

Dad

Mom says Dad slept most of the day. She was able to get him to eat a little lunch, but he choked on supper after a couple bites, so that ending eating for the day. He just doesn't know he needs to eat. He is swelling as his kidneys shut down.

I know I can't make it home to say goodbye, he wouldn't know I was there. But I am praying that there is someway I can make it home for the funeral. If I can drive without crying. It is amazing how many thoughts, memories etc flash through the mind as you realize you are about to lose something you have always had in your life.

Dad was more on the quiet side, but had a great smile that you loved to see. Without saying a word he made you feel important. I regret that he didn't teach us all he knew about nature, which was allot. Teaching just wasn't his thing. There are five of us kids and I don't remember him ever spanking a one of us. No even raising his voice, we just obeyed. No questions. Can't explain it, definitely a gift.

We all will cry for our loss. We all will have special things that we will miss and remember. Excuse me, I need tissues.

DAD UPDATE

Dad was very, very unhappy at the nursing home. As with Alzheimer's patients, they don't understand what is happening. Dad said he didn't want to be there with all those 'old' people, he also thought everyone was just going to leave him there. Not to worry, it seems, one of the things he has lost is the brains ability to know he is hungry and thirsty. Friday morning his blood pressure was 62/40. At 7:00 AM he was whisked off to the hospital.

Now on an IV, we are just waiting. He won't be coming home. He has pneumonia in both lungs, he kidneys are shutting down, and his bone marrow isn't producing enough platelets. The Doctor and nurses are doing all they can to make him comfortable. And we are doing all we can, as the family to accept this. Not easy for any of us.

The Doctor told Mom she was doing a great job keeping home life normal and comfortable for Dad. But the virus in the lungs was just more than Dad's body could handle.

Thank you for listening and praying.

Susie

Memories

One year our family memorized the last half of Romans 12. We used The New International Version. We can still quote it. Here is my challenge to you this New Year, from The Message:

Love from the center of who you are; don't fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle.

Don't burn out; keep yourselves fueled and aflame. Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant. Don't quit in hard times; pray all the harder. Help needy Christians; be inventive in hospitality.

Bless your enemies; no cursing under your breath. Laugh with your happy friends when they're happy; share tears when they're down. Get along with each other; don't be stuck up. Make friends with nobodies; don't be the great somebody.

Don't hit back; discover beauty in everyone. If you've got it in you, get along with everyone. Don't insist on getting even; that's not for you to do. "I'll do the judging", says God, "I'll take care of it."

Our scriptures tell us that if you see you enemy hungry, go buy that person lunch, or if he's thristy, get him a drink. Your generosity will surprise him with goodness. Don't let evil get the best of you; get the best out of evil by doing good.

Today

God wants us to move
through this day
with a quiet heart,
an inward asurance that
He is in control,
and a peaceful certainty
that our lives
are in His hands.